Nothing kills a man faster than his own thoughts.
Observation – something that people do in their free time, or out of habit, or simply because they love to. I feel like I come in the blend of all these categories. I observe a lot, the people around me, their behaviour, the surrounding, the vibes I get from it, etc. I tend to observe the behaviours, body language, etc of people a lot. We generally tend to observe the people we love even more because you only check on the growth of the plants from the seeds that you’ve sowed.
But I’ve come to realize this one thing off lately, that you live the life by the path through which you observe. Didn’t get the point? Read further –
Your life turns out to be the way you observe things around you. Why? How? Because these things are interrelated –when you observe you think when you think you act, when you act, you live.
When we observe our loved ones, we tend to think more about them, this normal habit most of the time leads us to overthink. When we overthink, we tend to plot and strategize ways to control a situation which might never ever be in our hands. And when we fail, we end up giving a complete derailing vibe to the person we share the relationship with, risking the relationship to get sour.
So why do we do it? It’s because our minds convince us that there is some sort of pay-off for this obsessive thinking, that maybe once we find the solution we’ll feel better and it will all make sense. It doesn’t work like that, you can never know what is going on in someone else’s head and how they’re feeling. Overthinking and coming to a negative conclusion only leads you too stupid actions whereas coming to a positive conclusion ends up giving you false hopes. You need to strike a neutral balance between these both, especially if you want the person concerned, in your life for years to come.
Observing is good, but when you do it in excess it leads to overthinking. And as the famous quote goes, “Anything in excess is poison”
Sitting and over-analyzing a situation, dissecting the person’s thought process (which you don’t really know about), assuming their actions and reacting based on this assumption only freaks the other person out and creates distance between you two. Instead, observe the happy changes, focus on the good and walk around with the ‘Let’s see where it goes, it, either way, wouldn’t affect my mental state’ attitude. People with this attitude are the strongest creatures who’ll definitely go to places because it is they who control their minds and not the other way round.
Overthinking is a badass rebellion who will keep getting into your head as much as you try to kick it out. So, the best way to avoid it? To blatantly avoid it. Haha.
Always remember, you get the vibes you create, you can’t expect a garden of roses when you yourself have sowed the seeds of bitter gourd.
I don’t really know how many of y’all could relate to this, but this is something that I’ve learned very recently, and I hope to share in this space the things I learn from my daily living. More about this in my next post!